Some of us may feel like our world is caving in, the walls are moving closer, we are feeling claustrophobic…we are directed to “stay at home” to keep ourselves and others safe. At home, we can sometimes feel totally alone, with our thoughts and fears. Our fears may become bigger, and bigger, and bigger, until they overwhelm. We fear this will never end, except in the worst outcome ever, such as death. This is “catastrophizing,” a way of thinking that is a cognitive distortion.
Folks who are in a situation that feels out of their control, whether amidst the outbreak of COVID-19 or living within an abusive relationship, may see an unfavorable outcome to the event and decide that the outcome could only be a disaster. For instance, “I will get sick and never get better and be disabled for the rest of my life.” Or, “If he leaves me, I will never find anyone else and I will never be happy again.” Or, “If I try to leave, no one will believe me and there will be no help and I will be homeless and penniless.” The fearful thoughts we have are magnified and can lead to depression and anxiety and other stress-related disorders, diminishing our immune system and our daily functioning. Thankfully, there are some ways we can become aware of our catastrophic thinking and help ourselves feel better:
- Acknowledge that bad things do happen. Life is full of challenges; we will have good days and bad days. Though not all days will be bad.
- Recognize when thoughts are invalid or irrational. Learning to recognize these thoughts will help us become better equipped to handle them.
- Say “stop!” Say this or another mantra out loud, such as “no more!” or “go away!” Saying these words out loud can interrupt the stream of thoughts that are magnified in that moment.
- Think about a more positive outcome: “If I become ill, my family will help me overcome and we will grow closer.” Or “If he leaves me, I will have more time to work on myself and my wants and needs.”
- Repeat positive affirmations daily (or more often!): “I am strong and have immense talents.” “I am independent.” “I am the architect of my life; I build its foundation and choose its contents.” “I am brimming with energy and my joy knows no limits.”
- Practice excellent self-care. Get enough rest and find time for those stress-relieving techniques you love, whether it be exercise, art, yoga, music, meditation, journaling, walking in the forest.
We will be okay, and we can live a life with less fear and anxiety. If you need help working through your catastrophic thinking, reach out to someone. Mental health providers are available in your community, and the PeaceWorks, Inc. team can help you if you are struggling to leave an abusive relationship while the fear overwhelms. We are here for you.
By Tracy Chaney, Client Advocate
